True…
I don’t feel calm around your presence—
you overpower me.
My emotions,
my energy,
my control.
Even in moments of prayer,
if you pass by,
your aura drowns mine—
even my spiritual one.
I shake my head a thousand times
just to erase your face
from my sight…
But my eyes stay stuck.
My heart still hopes
for miracles—
for scenarios
that will never happen.
It burns me.
Burns my identity,
my truth,
my beliefs.
You twist everything inside me—
making me calm one second,
and restless the next.
Sometimes,
I feel the sadness in you,
a heavy unhappiness.
Other times—
you’re someone else entirely.
Regardless,
I consume you.
Why?
Why are you doing this?
When I stay away to protect myself,
you appear again—
tearing down my walls
like they never mattered.
Not even a flicker of mercy
for the weight I carry,
the harshness I’ve faced.
Why can’t you just
do something?
Like—
hold my hands,
just once.
Assure me
this restlessness is gone,
so I can finally
sleep peacefully…
Or—
free me.
Free me from your thoughts,
your echoes,
your gravity—
so I never see you in my dreams again.
Forget it.
I don’t even know
what I want from you anymore.
Love?
Peace?
Closure?
A little kindness
on your way out?
Maybe nothing.
Maybe everything.
But I just want it
to stop hurting
like this.
By Ray.K
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