True…I don’t feel calm around your presence—you overpower me.My emotions,my energy,my control.Even in moments of prayer,if you pass by,your aura drowns mine—even my spiritual one.I shake my head a thousand timesjust to erase your facefrom my sight…But my eyes stay stuck.My heart still hopesfor miracles—for scenariosthat will never happen.It burns me.Burns my identity,my truth,my beliefs.You twist everything inside me—making me calm one second,and restless the next.Sometimes,I feel the sadness in you,a heavy unhappiness.Other times—you’re someone else entirely.Regardless,I consume you.Why?Why are you doing this?When I stay away to protect myself,you appear again—tearing down my wallslike they never mattered.Not even a flicker of mercyfor the weight I carry,the harshness I’ve faced.Why can’t…

I keep sayingI’m ready to let go—but my fingers hesitateat the thought of changing passwordsthat still hide your name. Your shadow still sitsin the soft corners of my lifepulling me towards youeven when you don’t belong here. I still see your facewhen I blink too long.Feel it, mimic it—your smile,your eyes,your words,your charm. The way you nourishedwithout needing to try. You are beauty,not because my energy lit you up,or because it’s an idea of loving you,but because you simply are. A grace of Venus,a Queen.A divine breathin human skin. There is wealth in your laughter,light in your stillness,blessing in your touch,abundance on your face. Like a goddess—too holy to name.Still…

I still feel happyjust knowing…what color you wore,how calm, how softYou areThe smile, the glowAnd how gracefullyYou move in a flow.. I still feel happyseeing your carrecognizing it—like my heart memorizedevery curve,every number on your plate…without even tryingIt just feels innate. Noticing your new phone.New jobNew clothesAny upgrade you doas if my soulsecretly signed upfor every notificationthat belongs to you.. I find myself touchingthe things you touched—the colors you used while drawing,the notes you madeThe signature you dothe spaces where you stood,and the picturesfrom your childhood.. I love to feelwhat you feltin all those quiet moments—when you were alone…talking to yourselfin the shower,your room,your safe spaces.In different phases.. The energyyou…